I am forever wondering how to make the world a better place. For example, banana skins! They are everywhere, and people are slipping on them left, right and centre. Adding insult to injury, dogs, unleashed, think it’s playtime. They laugh with their big teethy mouths and lick your face as you try to pick yourself up. In the middle distance, cats sit on walls and snigger.
Lamp posts are a similar issue. Whoever thought of putting them right where we try and walk? They must be padded, ideally with candy floss.
Which makes me think of cars. How can we avoid car accidents? Cars are mostly made of metal, which is really hard. When one of these metal cars hits another, it’s never a pretty thing. And the noise is ghastly.
So, what if cars were made of butter? People would be less likely to get injured. And if there was damage, you could just scrape things back into place with a knife, or, if this wasn’t handy, a credit card.
Of course there is always a snag. Things would get complicated in summer, because these butter vehicles would melt in the sun. And attaching a fridge to your car isn’t an option for everyone.
I feel the only answer is to make them from down pillows. Car accidents would be pillow fights. What fun.